STOP YELLING!!!

BE PATIENT! CALM DOWN! STOP YELLING! Sadly these are phrases that I find coming out of my mouth more times than I'd like to admit. And the majority of the times that I am "loudly proclaiming" these statements to my girls, I simultaneously recognize this ironic truth in my behavior- that I am acting just as much out of control as they are.

This last Monday, as I sat under biblical teaching, I was convicted, greatly, greatly convicted. My oldest daughter is what some would call passionate and dramatic, and what we often call, overly emotional, quick to anger, and a huge drama queen. We have days, weeks and even months where I see progress, control, and change. And then we have days, weeks and months that are filled with meltdown after meltdown. Our beautiful little girl is an angel at school. She is every teacher's dream: obedient, task-oriented, a leader, and respectful. But at home, she somehow, often "loses it". And I will find myself challenging her- "Would you talk to your teacher that way?" "Would you throw a fit at school like that?" "Would you treat a friend in your class like that?" "Why can't you show me the same respect you show Mrs. Silva?" And then this week I was reminded of these sad truths: 1> My daughter feeds off of me and my attitude. 2> My daughter does the same thing that adults do- she shows her worst side at home.

As I sat there and listened to what purity should look like, how when we are pure at heart, the outside matches the inside, there is a true transparency in our behavior, I realized that if I expect my daughter to act at home like she acts in public, I need to set the example! I know that there are many times that I would not use the same tone or phrasing in my discipline if a neighbor was over (or even if a window was open!). I desire so much to be less of the person my kids see so often, and more of the woman that God created me to be- a self-controlled mother and wife with a kind and quiet spirit and a desire to live with a pure heart, always seeking righteousness. So as I have sought help from the Lord this week to respond and discipline in love and not out of anger or frustration, I must admit that our week has gone so much better! The amount of meltdowns has decreased, the sass of the tongue has been a little less, and the overall stress of our home has been completely different. Now I know that training her little heart is going to be a continual work, and there are going to be days that go smoother, and days that, let's face it, are somewhat miserable. But if I desire to change and shape her heart, I have to start first with my own. So pray for me. Pray that I will continually seek strength from our perfect Father, encouragement and wisdom from His Word, and pray for change! To Him be the glory!